Oh Dolly....
Dolly Parton was one of those rare people who showed a relentlessly positive image to the world. Not naïve. Not saccharine. Humble, funny, and always adorable, she simply seemed to understand that there was plenty of ugliness in the world already, and she had no intention of adding to it. There will be a lifesize hole in our hearts for some time, but she left us a lifetime of music and moxie to help fill it.
But there is something else about Dolly that I keep thinking about.
When I was growing up, she was always the butt of the joke. If boobs were mentioned by anyone, anywhere, in any capacity, Dolly Parton was going to come up. Everyone miming the shape of her boobs, tipping over laughing, raising their eyebrows. Boobs, boobs, boobs. She never apologized for them. She never seemed particularly bothered by the comparisons, at least not in public. But mainly, her name was synonymous with BOOBS.
The world owes Dolly a collective apology.
Because somewhere along the way, the joke stopped being funny. Look at what we talk about now. Her songwriting. Her voice. Her wigs and her style. Her acting. Her business acumen. Her astonishing generosity. Her philanthropy. Her kindness. Her ability to make room for people who don't look, think or live exactly like she does. Her prolific artistry. The sheer amount of good she put into the world.
We still know about the boobs, obviously. Dolly herself certainly never forgot about them. But they aren't the story anymore.
And I think there's something else to remember whenever people say that things never change. Think of Dolly. Dolly didn't spend her life trying to convince everyone that the joke was unfair. She just kept going. She kept writing. Kept singing. Kept creating. Kept giving. Kept being funny. Kept being Dolly.
And eventually, the social noise lost its power. She outlasted the joke. She was always so much bigger and better than the easy joke. And she will always be bigger than it in our hearts, and in our culture.
A pure icon. ❤️
Oh… one more thing... we've gotta talk about Rhinestone.
I will defend this movie until the day I die. I know it was widely panned when it came out, but I simply refuse to participate in that narrative. It's perfection.
Dolly plays a country singer who makes a bet that she can turn a completely hopeless New York cab driver into a country star. Unfortunately, that cab driver is Sylvester Stallone. Watching Dolly patiently try to teach Sly how to sing country, dress country, walk country, be country is one of the great underappreciated comedy performances of the 1980s. The movie is ridiculous. Dolly is hysterical. I could watch it all day.
But I truly love it because there's something wonderfully Dolly about the whole thing. She stands up for herself. She refuses to be a victim, a joke or somebody else's punchline. She knows exactly who she is, and she never seems to need anyone else to define her.
For someone who was so often reduced to the embodiment of "feminism," big boobs, big hair and a big smile, Dolly always showed us what actual feminism could look like. She didn't have to tell us. She showed us.